Stone Path (after Tu Mu)
High up the cold mountain a stone path rises
to the village in the white clouds.
I stop the carriage and inhale the evening fragrance,
its red, frosted maple leaves richer than any spring flower.
I may have inserted a bit more of myself into this adaptation than is my usual custom. I hope it does not intrude.
The transliteration on Chinese-poems.com reads:
Far on cold mountain stone path slant
White cloud live place be households
Stop carriage because love maple forest evening
Frost leaf red than second month flower
What do I know about the original? But your adaptation gets my vote of approval as incomparably beautiful poetry! “Red frosted maple leaves” does it for me!
Ron
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Thanks, Ron. Now that line makes me hungry for some reason…
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Very beautiful poem. I’m happy to have come across your words and look forward to read more – what a treat! Christine
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Thank you, Christine. I very much enjoyed your blog.
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Your words, your words…
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With Tu Mu’s inspiration!
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Ah. So moving. Thank you for sharing this.
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Thank you, Emily.
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A neighbor explained to me yesterday that she doesn’t harvest her cabbage until after it’s been frosted. It tastes so much better and sweeter, she said. I asked why the frost did that. She, an extremely knowledgeable herbalist, said, “It just does,” or something to that effect. All of which is to say, I’m guessing that a similar process is at work to make those frosted maples actually smell richer than spring flowers, as you say.
This poem to me combines eloquence and keen observation. Thank you!
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Thank you, Sybille. “It just does” applies to so much, doesn’t it?
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LOL! Indeed. And right in this moment, I’m so grateful for that reality. Wishing you a good weekend.
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Beautiful, Robert, and so sensually vivid, I wanted to be there.
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I trend towards the abstract, so working on these helps keep me grounded.
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Such a beautiful poem, just lovely! The colours, the fragrance and your personal touch all add to giving one the poetic experience! 🙂 Thank you, Robert.
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Thank you.
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Wonderful! Again, you’ve breathed new life into a transliteration. My interpretation turned out to be concrete poetry again, and ended up with an additional thought, too: http://wp.me/p30cCH-18z
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Thank you, Christine. I love your version, particularly the “slope.” Nicely done.
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This poem spoke strongly to me, almost like a story prompt. I wonder if I will be the one to tell it.
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yes nice translation, I also see many leaves more beautiful than the spring flowers, I really identify with this poet, thanks so much for this precious translation my friend!
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Thank you, Phil. There is indeed great beauty in turning leaves. But then I am an autumn kind of guy.
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Me too!
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Don’t they say – ‘simplicity is the essence of beauty’? – This poem and your adaptation amply prove the point. Thank you for sharing Robert.
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Thank you for your continued kindness, Anjali.
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And for yours Robert 🙂
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Just echoing the folks above here–beautiful poem. To me, maybe because all around here the maple leaves are changing, this poem expressed the something about autumn that invigorates us, whether we want to complain about the cold or not.
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Thanks, Jeff. I’m still awaiting the invigorating cold. Maybe next month. 🙂
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Reblogged this on Moments of Zen.
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Thanks for reblogging!
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I nominated you for the One Lovely Blog Award. I love your poetry.
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Thank you for your kindness. I’ve elected to not accept blog awards, but I truly appreciate the gesture.
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Reblogged this on Vox Populi.
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I appreciate that. Thanks!
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Absolutely digging your transliteration poems. Might have a go at it!
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Thanks. You should try it. At the very least, it is an exercise in econnomy of language.
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