Calvin Coolidge — Live or Memorex?

Posted on October 13, 2015 by robert okaji

This poem is dedicated to haiku master and good friend Ron Evans, who sponsored the title for the Tupelo Press 30/30 Project fundraiser I participated in during August. I firmly believe it is the worst title in the history of the Tupelo Press 30/30 Project! Ron is moving to Indiana, where he will, alas, no longer be able to find kolaches, breakfast tacos or Texas barbecue. I will of course send him lavishly photographed and detailed reviews of my adventures with these foods. Take care, Ron. We will miss you.

Calvin Coolidge — Live or Memorex?

They say the wind in Alvarado bypasses closed doors, slips through
book-laden walls and plate glass and into your dreams where it circles
and accumulates, whirling, whirling, steadily gaining force, gathering
loose pages and errant thoughts and memories too combustible to
burn, ignoring time’s compression and the gravity of dying suns, forever
counting, talking, thinking, looking up and out between the long nights.

unable to sleep he opens a window daring the wind

The 30th President of the United States breathes and writes at the junction
of an invisible house and a wheat field in Alvarado, in the guise of a
74-year old haiku poet. No longer the solemn ass, Cal laughs and speaks
and observes his two birthdays, recalling Harding’s scandals and Dorothy
Parker’s “How can they tell?” with equal relish. Sometimes he dresses
in tails and top hat, and speaks in 17-syllable phrases. Sometimes.

spitting out sake in the shadow’s glare death forestalled

Alvarado’s laureate is leaving it all behind – the presidency, the books,
the kolaches – catching the next breeze out of town, a silver-tongued
dust devil riding the word, spewing puns all the way to Indiana. But
buried in a waterproof box near Oswald’s grave, 314 cassette tapes
capable of shattering crystal carry his voice further than their unwound
lengths, whirring incessantly, celebrating life, praising the long wind.

standing in the sun wisdom blows by no questions today

35 thoughts on “Calvin Coolidge — Live or Memorex?”

Ron on October 13, 2015 at 9:10 am said:

My God, my God…Wonderful beyond my power to exaggerate! I thank you with all my rewired and replumbed heart. you are truly the best friend I have ever had! May God bless you and your family all the days (and nights) of you life.

Ronzini of Alvarado

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- moodyrobin93 on October 13, 2015 at 10:20 am said:
  
  Beautiful! Ron, Robert, Robin is inspired. Ron, hope you are settling in your new life. 🙂
  
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  - robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:39 pm said:
    
    Thank you, Robin.
    
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- robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:38 pm said:
  
  You are of course the master of exaggeration and haiku, Obi-Ron. 🙂
  
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  - Ron on October 13, 2015 at 10:13 pm said:
    
    And Master of Ceremonies, too. You forget that ome?! 🙂
    
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  - robert okaji on October 14, 2015 at 12:46 pm said:
    
    And master of, uh, no, I won’t go there. 🙂
    
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Nurse Kelly on October 13, 2015 at 9:33 am said:

Thank you for sharing this, Robert. Truly remarkable writing, and such a beautiful tribute.

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- robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:42 pm said:
  
  It was a fun piece to write.
  
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  - Nurse Kelly on October 13, 2015 at 12:44 pm said:
    
    It shows!
    
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rivrvlogr on October 13, 2015 at 10:02 am said:

Most excellent, and possible, I would say, only through a kinship that will survive the separation of miles.

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- robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:47 pm said:
  
  Thanks, Ken. This poem could not have been written for anyone but Ron (but then who else would have provided that crazy title?).
  
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john hauge on October 13, 2015 at 10:15 am said:

i’m not much of a haiku fan but the three here are very nice as is the rest of the piece.

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- robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:50 pm said:
  
  Thanks, John. I’m not much of a haiku poet, but felt compelled to at least try, if only to cause Ron to shake his head sadly and say “that’s not the way you do it.” 🙂
  
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Leigh W. Smith on October 13, 2015 at 10:53 am said:

It dawns on me even more now that I’m able to read it after a month-and-a-half or so lapsing . . . Such a likeable poem, Bob, that brims over with good-natured humor and wistfulness, on both macro/cosmic and micro-levels (“time’s compression and the gravity of dying suns” is spectacular, among others). What a wonderful tribute to a friend!

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- robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:52 pm said:
  
  The poem contains many inside jokes and references that touch upon Ron’s zany humor (and our correspondence). Much fun.
  
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merrildsmith on October 13, 2015 at 11:50 am said:

This was really wonderful!

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- robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:52 pm said:
  
  Thank you.
  
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Sunshine Jansen on October 13, 2015 at 12:22 pm said:

Absolutely ingenious, RO. Our friends do inspire our very best.

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- robert okaji on October 13, 2015 at 12:53 pm said:
  
  They do, indeed, Sunshine. Thank you.
  
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The Story in the Frame on October 14, 2015 at 8:31 am said:

“314 cassette tapes capable of shattering crystal carry his voice further than their unwound
lengths” – Definitely my favorite part. Such a fantastic visual. The whole thing was phenomenal. Excellent work!

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- robert okaji on October 14, 2015 at 12:47 pm said:
  
  Homage to Pi and the old Memorex commercials. Thank you for your kind words.
  
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Jilanne Hoffmann on October 14, 2015 at 11:47 am said:

Robert, you just keep astounding the beejeezus out of everyone.

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- robert okaji on October 14, 2015 at 12:48 pm said:
  
  You are always too kind, Jilanne. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. 🙂
  
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nombre de la pluma on October 14, 2015 at 12:02 pm said:

Robert, if you’re to be in Indiana I hope you’ll look into ISFPC and perhaps even be close enough to get in the Noble writer’s group, I used to have a lot of fun with the group. DM

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- robert okaji on October 14, 2015 at 12:27 pm said:
  
  Thanks for letting me know. I’m staying in Texas, but I’ll let Ron know about the group.
  
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  - Ron on October 14, 2015 at 1:24 pm said:
    
    Jeez, I can’t believe I figured that one out! You were really baiting me on that one!
    
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Ron on October 14, 2015 at 1:25 pm said:

Bob, would you mind finding out an address where the club meets. Would love to join but can’t find an address where they meet. Thanks!

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- nombre de la pluma on October 14, 2015 at 1:37 pm said:
  
  http://indianapolis.eventful.com/events/noble-writers-group-/E0-001-005820611-8 They met on the first Tuesday of every month last I heard.
  
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  - robert okaji on October 14, 2015 at 1:43 pm said:
    
    Thank you!
    
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  - Ron on October 14, 2015 at 2:58 pm said:
    
    Well, fooey — the poetry group meets at a place nearly three hours away from my igloo. 😦
    
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  - nombre de la pluma on October 14, 2015 at 3:39 pm said:
    
    Well, Ron, I guess you have three options: 1) start a writers group in a library or cafe near you or, 2) move so you can attend my old stomp or, 3) keep blogging and I’ll enjoy your work all for myself.
    
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Carrie Birde on October 14, 2015 at 4:56 pm said:

Wow. Bolded. Underlined. Heartfelt.

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- robert okaji on October 14, 2015 at 6:05 pm said:
  
  Thanks, Carrie.
  
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Ron on October 14, 2015 at 6:30 pm said:

You read my mind “nombre de la pluma.” I plan to start a poetry society in our home and move to larger digs when our membership is large enough! Seriously. I’m very excited! 🙂

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- nombre de la pluma on October 15, 2015 at 8:10 am said:
  
  Excellent plans, Ron. I wish you continued success. Do you have a wordpress or other blog address I may subscribe to?~Deon Mumple
  
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