In Response to Nadia’s Misdirected Email, I State Exactly What I Am Looking For

Posted on July 6, 2017 by robert okaji

Independence Day. July 4. Perhaps amidst our celebrating we might consider what those words mean. Freedom has become more precious to me of late.

In Response to Nadia’s Misdirected Email, I State Exactly What I Am Looking For

Balance. The ability to stand on one foot, on a tightrope, and juggle AR-15s,
ethics and dollar bills, while chanting the U.S. Constitution, in tongues.

Or good health.

Unweighted dreams.

A mechanism for disagreeing without needing to annihilate the opposition.

Doorways without doors, truth without fear.

A simple tulip.

One word to describe that instant between thought and pulled trigger,
intent and wish, the elevated pulse and sense of diminished space and time.

Sanctuary. Regret. Apology. Respect.

A tonic to the bitterness, a foil to the sweet.

Fitted sheets that fold. Uncommon sense.

Love in the abstract. More bacon. Smiles.

A closet that embraces everything you place in it. Everything.

The means of unfiring guns, of reversing wounds to undamaged flesh,
and rounds to their magazines, full and never used.

Self-organizing drawers. Due process.

Mothers who know only tears of joy.

One peaceful day.

Just one.

This first appeared on the blog in July 2016. The poem was a response to an email asking a question intended for someone else: “What exactly are you looking for?”

40 thoughts on “In Response to Nadia’s Misdirected Email, I State Exactly What I Am Looking For”

nananoyz on July 4, 2017 at 10:45 am said:

Perfection.

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 11:00 am said:
  
  Thank you, Leslie. I’m finding mindless celebration a bit difficult these days.
  
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  - nananoyz on July 4, 2017 at 11:11 am said:
    
    Ditto.
    
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  - rivrvlogr on July 4, 2017 at 12:44 pm said:
    
    I understand that about mindless celebration,considering the times – not just in regards to the current administration, but also to the unequal granting of liberties.
    
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    - robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 12:54 pm said:
      
      There’s so much inequality in treatment of people!
      
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memadtwo on July 4, 2017 at 10:57 am said:

Still hoping. Happy 4th! (K)

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 11:01 am said:
  
  Never stop! Thanks, Kerfe.
  
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angela1313 on July 4, 2017 at 11:06 am said:

Still altogether too relevant (and great work). I’m using Bah Humbug for a lot more holidays these days.

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 11:40 am said:
  
  I’ve become quite the humbugger!
  
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St Brigid Press on July 4, 2017 at 11:07 am said:

Yes. Exactly this. ❤️

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 11:41 am said:
  
  Thank you, Emily!
  
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Linda Tauhid on July 4, 2017 at 11:27 am said:

I remember this! Another year of grace, insight and wisdom.

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 11:42 am said:
  
  Thanks, Linda. It’s been a tough year. I hope the next twelve months brings more grace.
  
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alisonmcghee on July 4, 2017 at 11:37 am said:

Love this. Yes to a complicated, complicated celebration, especially this year. Also. . . I am the queen of folding fitted sheets! 🙂

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 11:44 am said:
  
  OMG! The queen of folding fitted sheets! You must post an instructional video. I am the minor duke of wadding or rolling up fitted sheets. Ha!
  
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Ali Grimshaw on July 4, 2017 at 12:25 pm said:

Yes please. All of this. And dancing in the streets. Happy 4th Robert.

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 12:36 pm said:
  
  Happy 4th, Ali. Yes, unabashed dancing in the streets!
  
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Jazz Jaeschke on July 4, 2017 at 3:23 pm said:

All your wants still wanting …
(No amount of bacon could change that one)
Repeating intrigues … as this round ’tis the closet that tugs at me.
Keep wanting!

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 3:32 pm said:
  
  There’s never enough bacon. Sigh.
  
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Cate on July 4, 2017 at 3:28 pm said:

Even more powerful this year than last.

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 3:35 pm said:
  
  Thanks, Cate. It’s been a tough year, physically and emotionally, but the optimist in me keeps forcing himself out…
  
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danielpaulmarshall on July 4, 2017 at 5:11 pm said:

The way the lines bounce from one unrelated item (at least on the surface) to another, reflects inequality in an interesting way. I do joy in how you can move like that through your poems.

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 8:26 pm said:
  
  Thanks, Daniel. It is a reflection of the way my mind works, and also pays homage to the ordinary bits of life which occupy so much of our days.
  
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mwdunham on July 4, 2017 at 6:45 pm said:

Thoroughly enjoyed!

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 8:28 pm said:
  
  Thank you!
  
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Sunshine Jansen on July 4, 2017 at 9:56 pm said:

And this one gets even more precious to me. I needed something to calm my nerves down from all the evocations of warfare out there tonight; I thought it was another glass of wine, but no it was this. 🙂

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- robert okaji on July 4, 2017 at 10:06 pm said:
  
  Glad to provide some comfort, Sunshine. The incessant banging is driving me to distraction…
  
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10000hoursleft on July 5, 2017 at 2:06 am said:

The chance to like a post more than once

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- robert okaji on July 5, 2017 at 7:39 am said:
  
  Ha!
  
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apostlespeaks on July 5, 2017 at 3:54 am said:

Good one

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- robert okaji on July 5, 2017 at 7:40 am said:
  
  Thank you.
  
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derrickjknight on July 5, 2017 at 4:17 am said:

Superb

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- robert okaji on July 5, 2017 at 7:40 am said:
  
  Thanks, Derrick!
  
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pranabaxom on July 5, 2017 at 7:57 am said:

Robert, this is wonderful. Thanks.
What’s the point of repeating the the hollow words if we do not have faith on them or spin those words to our own benefits.

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- robert okaji on July 5, 2017 at 9:27 am said:
  
  Thank you, as always, for your comments. Perhaps we might resolve some smaller issues and then work our way up. Perhaps.
  
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Carrie Birde on July 5, 2017 at 4:00 pm said:

❤️

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Berna on July 6, 2017 at 6:39 pm said:

So many sparkles in this one. As a mother, I am drawn to “Mothers who only know tears of joy.” That one sparkles just a little more that the other words. Thank you.

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- robert okaji on July 6, 2017 at 8:39 pm said:
  
  We’ve had way too much of the other kind of tears.
  
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Alexandra Goodwin on July 8, 2017 at 10:10 am said:

“A mechanism for disagreeing without needing to annihilate the opposition.” Very powerful. You need to post and repost, and keep posting!

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- robert okaji on July 8, 2017 at 10:16 am said:
  
  Thanks for the encouragement, Alexandra!
  
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