Originally posted in February, 2014.
This is my first attempt at a haibun. Please forgive my transgressions.
Texas Haibun
I dream of poetry in all its forms, rising and flowing and subsiding without end, much like ice shrugging within itself. Last winter a hard freeze split a valve on the downstream side of the cistern. Had it cracked even a few inches up-line there would have been no need to replace the valve.
captive rain recalls
its journey towards the ground
the garden returns
The well terminates at 280 feet. The water is hard, but cool, and tastes of dark limestone and ancient rains.
Even the gnarled live oaks have dropped their leaves. Grass crunches underfoot and smells like dead insects and dried herbs. Mosquitoes have vanished. Only the prickly pears thrive. Their flowers are bright yellow and bloom a few days each year.
sauteed with garlic
nopalitos on my plate
their thorns, forgiven
I wipe sweat from my forehead with the back of the glove, and wonder how many ounces of fluid have passed through my body this year, how the rain navigates from clouds through layers of soil and stone, only to return, how a cold beer might feel sliding down my throat.
stoking the fire
winter rain whispers to me
forget tomorrow
Beautiful job. These are a hard form to write. I tried one and then unformed and reformed it into a haibun over and over again, never satisfied.
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Thank you. This is the only one I’ve managed to complete!
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Well, you deserve a bit congratulations for it!
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Is there anything you can’t do…except kiss your own elbow?! I wrote this exact same piece only with different words! Go figure. ๐
Ron
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My elbows are terribly unattractive, except to mosquitoes and dogs. ๐
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Robert, I love this haibun. What an interesting form. I was sorry to miss your month of off-the-cuff poems. Although I was technically off-line, I did sneak a few reads on my phone. Bravo! What a feat. I’d have loved to have commissioned one. Hopefully next time! Happy writing, Melissa
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Thank you, Melissa. I find the form challenging but interesting. I may try the 30-30 marathon again next year.
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I don’t know if you transgressed or not, but I really liked this. It is a very interesting form.
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Thank you!
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I really like this!
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Thank you.
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I only learned about this form this summer. I love how the three haiku flow through your haibun like water.
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Isn’t it a great form!
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I’m percolating my second-ever attempt at haibun in response to a prompt from Silver Birch Press. We’ll see if it comes out being respectable enough to submit.
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I look forward to reading the published version!
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Thanks for your (perhaps unwarranted) confidence!
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I believe!
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I do appreciate it!
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I knew only of haiku, not haibun. This is beautiful in form and content.
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Thanks, Heather. It’s a fun form.
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I like this form, and I love poetry for it, ever flexing and twirling in a marvelous dance. Great poem Robert.
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Thanks, Tammy! I enjoy trying out new forms.
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Lovely.
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Thank you.
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Yes, I am convinced that there is nothing you cannot doโexcept kiss your unattractive elbows. Glad to see you’re taking a little time off after August’s marathon.
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Ha! I definitely can’t do as much manual labor as I once did. The heat depletes me rather quickly these days.
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Sadly, I hadn’t heard of a haibun until now. Thank you very much for the introduction!
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You’re very welcome!
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Well, you will not hear any criticism from me–I am too uneducated in your craft to even have heard of a haibun. (Roar of laughter:my autocorrect wrote halibut!)
I think it is evocative and lovely. I like poems which I feel I am co-experiencing as I read, and this is one.
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I attempted to write a halibut, but floundered. ๐
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(Gleeful laughter!)
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Beautiful
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Thank you.
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Really good writing.
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Thanks very much.
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I love this. Especially the last couple stanzas:
“I wipe sweat from my forehead with the back of the glove, and wonder how many ounces of fluid have passed through my body this year, how the rain navigates from clouds through layers of soil and stone, only to return, how a cold beer might feel sliding down my throat.
“stoking the fire
winter rain whispers to me
forget tomorrow”
I’ve been in the place of these last 3 lines on so many trips. And I love being there.
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I was definitely in the “wiping sweat” place this past weekend. ๐
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Boy, you Texans don’t do anything small! I tried a haibun about a month ago and was playing around with my second one this morning. It’s an unusual form that I find myself very attracted to.
Great piece, I enjoyed it
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Thank you, P.S.
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Pingback: The Sea (Haibun) | Reflections on Halcyon Pond
Enjoyed this and congrats on finishing your poem marathon! Just curious, the only definition of the form I could find was “haikus interspersed with descriptive text” or something like that….are there any constraints, rules for the descriptive text…JIM
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Thanks, Jim. I’m certainly no expert, but I’d guess the rules vary widely, depending upon who’s making them up. ๐ They were traditionally dedicated to travel (Basho) or to descriptive character or landscape sketches. Would anyone else like to chime in here? Ron? I’d also venture forth and say that the haiku segments are not necessarily directly related to or descriptive of the prose pieces.
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Lovely to know. I had never heard of this form. I must try it. My poetry writing has gone through a dry patch. It needs a cool beer
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I’ve not played around with it much, but do enjoy working with it.
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Your associations of thought are quite remarkable in the way they lead the reader to look further, deeper, while your writing shows us the intimacy of your mental landscape.
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Thanks, Bart. The mental landscape often feels parched, but then a little drop or two squeezes in. ๐
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The Heron Clan III grand reading is coming up Ocobter 3. if I have time I will read one of yours. Which one from the book do you want me to read?
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Wonderful! Wish I could be there, Doug. How about “Ritual” or “Letter from Austin.” Your choice. Thanks very much.
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Now you’ve done it! One of these days I’ll probably have to interrupt my experiments with waka to try this form. Thanks!
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You must try it!
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Well done. Brings back Basho memories from college, the atmospheric haibuns that lingered long after class ended. Lovely.
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Thanks very much. Basho’s words have remained with me, as well.
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Very good at writing in the active voice!
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Thank you!
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