Where Have I Been?

We’re all terminal, but some of us have accelerated time lines.

A few months ago I was diagnosed with late stage metastatic lung cancer. The prognosis, as you might imagine, is not good, and the timing is uncertain. Do I have six months? Three years? More? Less? No one can say.

Before the diagnosis I lived for months with intense pain, a wildly plummeting heart rate, a lost voice, and questions. Many questions. As of today, the pain and heart rate are under control, the voice is returning, albeit sporadically and in a diminished state, and the questions have dwindled. WHAT has been answered, and WHY no longer matters. I am left with the ever-wavering WHEN, which I refuse to dwell upon, and HOW, which has morphed into “how shall I spend my remaining hours”?

To that end, I choose to celebrate, to share those brief wonders and observations, the sights, feel, smells and sounds of tangible and intangible joys, the moments and experiences, no matter how small and seemingly insignificant, that weave through our days and add immeasurably to our lives.

I’ll post these brief notes here from time to time, as circumstances allow. I hope you might join me, lend your wisdom and insight, tell your stories, offer poems, share your moments, memories and precious time. Life is good! Let’s celebrate!

182 thoughts on “Where Have I Been?

  1. Goodness Robert. I’m sorry I missed this when it was posted. The news hit me like a thunderbolt. I shall spend the early morning – my silent space – reflecting on your eight poems published in “No more can fit into the evening”. One a day and remembering you. “Even tongueless bells ring”.

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  2. Thank you for sharing. I am sad about your pain and I am encouraged that you have worked out which questions to ask and which ones to ignore. I pray that your days are filled with celebration. Thanks for leaving a positive mark on this world through your writing.

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  3. Heartbreaking news, Robert! I’m sorry I missed this when it was posted. Your poetry has meant much to me over the years. Thank you for sharing it. Thanks also for your blogging friendship. May your days be filled with celebration! Hoping your doctors can give you that long extension.

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  4. I popped by your page not expecting this painful news. I’m so sorry, dear traveler. I hope that our paths will cross for many more moons and then into the next lifetime as well after you return to the river of love from whence you sprang.

    Blessings.

    Kay

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